I was a little jealous of some families when I saw them spending time together, going on vacations and celebrating festive occasions. This specially happened on days when I had an argument with my husband. However, this changed when we welcomed our little bundle of joy. I had promised myself that I would gift her healthy and happy environment that would help her blossom. One of my doctors had advised me that your kid is like a bud desiring to open up. Make sure that when you are with her, your focus is not diverted to other chores of your office or home. These words of her are still etched in my mind.
Creating a healthy, happy and creative environment for your family is not hard at all. Certainly, you cannot transform 360 degrees, one fine day. Concentrate on one expect of your lifestyle at a time, and in a few months of time, your home and family would be one of the happiest. Now, while you are into making your home and family a happier one, you can do it in two ways. One, instill positive values in the family members – including yourself. And two, do up your home creatively to make it happy. Let’s begin with the house deco, because it is easier.
For the Home
Good Begets Better
Surround yourself with good things, good people and good home decor. When you see a smiling face on the wall, you are mostly likely to emote that face. Happy memories and pictures on your wall will create a positive domino effect in your life. Negative things will make you feel sad. For instance, tuck away broken things or simply discard them. Good things will result in a better life.
Lighting Works Wonder
Some lights are simply sad. They produce a dull light that make you feel burdened. Make sure that your home lights up like a happy face does. Not only sunlight but also artificial lighting should be well balanced in your home. You can experiment with lights by using chandeliers, bulbs, hangings, etc. I would prefer going green by using earthen lamps or fragrant candles, just for a cozy feeling.
A Happy Corner
Are you fond of a particular corner in your house? I certainly have a soft corner for a specific side of our living room. I have placed a bean bag in that corner and covered it up with some colorful sheets. With the help of my toddler, I have even pinned some handmade stars on the sheets. Whenever I feel glum, I light up an earthen lamp and play some good music. The best part is that it even gives me a view outside the window. This is my happy corner, do you have yours?
Play with Colours
When we shifted to our new apartment, we were sure that we will use good colours to make the house feel big and cozy at the same time. What we did is that we chose a green colour for a single wall and balanced it with lemon for other parts of the house. We have beautiful pictures and frames on that wall. The wall is known as ‘The Happy Wall’. The moment we see that wall, we feel good as a family. You too can play with colours in your home. You need not decorate the entire house; just get a bright orange vase or a yellow photo frame. This is just a suggestion – I mean that you should get quirky when choosing home decor.
A Happy Kitchen
The family that eats together stays together. Make sure that you at least one meal in a day together. It can be anytime – even an evening tea with cookies! Do not switch on television at this time – but talk about ideas, food, taste, etc. At least once in a week, you should plan to cook meals together. Planning and cooking meals will bring you closer as you get to spend more time with each other. Do not cook in a hurry. Always have a plan ready for the meal. I plan for three meals in advance, so that I do not have to rush. I cannot cook well when I am anxious. To make things more interesting, I plan to hang a blackboard outside the kitchen that mention ‘Today’s Menu’. This way, my family can be prepared and even make changes if they feel so. A happy kitchen is the foundation of a happy home.
De-clutter Your House
Clear the scrap and the crap from your house. Once in a while, clear the drawers and donate the things that you have not been using for a while. You can even sell it to someone who requires it. Do not invest in several equipment or gadgets. Before purchasing, assess the need for the thing that you are buying. An organized home will definitely set the tone of happiness.
For the Family
This has been taught to me by my husband. It is difficult for me to express myself when I am angry. I tend to bottle up the feelings and then suddenly burst on matters that didn’t require anger at all. Instead, what I do nowadays is say what I feel. Even we have taught our kids to say what they feel. We listen to them. This gives us a peek into their world. Opening channels of communication will bring your family closer. However, a word of caution is that you forbid using negative words. It might express you better in certain circumstances, but they are bad for your child’s mindset.
Choose the Right Language
What do you do before meeting the important clients? You might be re-thinking what to reveal and what not to for maintaining the relationship. This goes for your family. Often, bad and hurtful words might instill fear and anxiety, especially in the kids. Not only words, but language in entirety along with the right tone will inspire your kids to follow suit. Patience, love and support are required even when we communicate. Right from the beginning, use a language that boosts the self-worth of your child.
Demonstrate Your Love
While you love your family, you are weak when it comes to demonstrating it. Hug your kids often. Say, ‘I love you’ whenever needs be. Cuddles work wonders when the child is feeling low. Whenever my kiddo insists that I should make her eat lunch, I do that instantly. The more you love, the more love you get. I remember my aunt used to scold my cousins in case of bicycle accidents, when we were quite young. As opposed to this, I remember my father, who used to hold me in his arms and say, “That is okay. Accidents happen. You should learn from them.” His words were magical and healed my wounds instantly. Children require your love the most when they are going through a bad phase.
Inspire Your Family
When you as a spouse or a parent behave erratically, the other family members follow suit. You are a role model for your family. The language you choose, the confidence you exhibit, the way you eat or behave or choose a lifestyle is all been watched and copied. When you are angry on certain things, it vibrates in the environment of the house. You might notice that everybody in the family is behaving a little weird. This is because your anger has created negative vibrations. Hence, refrain from letting your anger or anxiety bog you and your family down. Even if it does, make sure that you get out of it as soon as possible.
Chuck the Expectations
The more you expect, more is the misery. Set reasonable goals for the day. Prepare yourself for the worst. Do not expect things to go as you had planned for. This will eliminate fear and burden in the environment. Take one hour at a time. Make a point to take breaks in between. It might happen that some of your days are not productive and you feel like just lying down. Such situations call for just lying down and watch your favourite shows.
You need not make great efforts to build a happy, healthy and a creative environment at home. Just take life lightly. Here is a caution though, ‘happiness’ cannot be measured; it’s a feeling. Do not judge an argument or a meltdown as a failure of your efforts. The best kept secret of a happy home is ‘love’. Love conquers everything. After becoming a mother, I realized that it is better to forget and forgive quickly. Hurt and anger consume much space not only in your body but also family. I wish you a happy and healthy family.